The stone is heavier today after I learned of the sudden passing of my husband's uncle. He had a massive heart attack and died early this morning. His death has hit me hard for several reasons - not the least of which he was a dear person, well loved and cared for his elderly mother (my husband's grandmother) for many years. My heart goes out to Granny, who has had to bury three children before her own passing.

There have been some dramatic changes in my life over the past weeks (that for personal reasons I won't explain fully - out of respect for those involved) - marriages have ended, people have passed one, friendships have been tested, and health concerns loom heavily. I am a strong person, but as one thing piles onto the other, I wonder how much stronger I must be. My husband said today in an effort to comfort me 'well these things come in three's' then I reminded him that this is 'thing' number six...

Today was a difficult day, but I know that tomorrow will be a new one. In the days to come we will celebrate Uncle Tom's life.

cloudy with a chance of showers


....lots of tears these days - going through a very difficult time. It is a time of dramatic change, dramatic skies in my life or at least in the lives surrounding me. I am being impacted by these events deeply, and it is a time of great learning for me personally. There is blue sky waiting to emerge - hopefully sooner rather than later. I am hoping alot for sooner. I miss the sunshine.

sharing some joy :-)

courage

This weekend is our Canadian Thanksgiving - this afternoon was the first of three celebrations I will be part of - had linner (lunch/ dinner - I convinced my neices and nephews and daughters this was a real term today). It was a good afternoon - and I am deeply thankful for children today. The day also had some more serious undertones - with my mother's health and news that my younger brother's marriage is ending... I am thankful today for the little moments - for the smile and giggle of my youngest nephew, who seems almost to be a twin to me (he looks very very similar to me when I was the same age - right down to the uncontrollable white blond hair), for sharing a meal together with the people that I love dearly, for having my husband home safely after what was a very challenging and worrisome four weeks.... I am thankful for a great many things and people in my life. I am so deeply greatful for what arrives when I am open to it. After linner, I went to a bookshop and did a bit of shopping (Monday is my rest day and I am looking forward to just reading and being with my family) - three things stood out for me... ok two books and one magazine. I bought Pema Chodron's newest book called Taking The Leap: Freeing Ourselves from Old Habits and Fears and The Boy Who Harnessed The Wind by William Kamkwamba. Then, at the last moment, I took a stroll through the magazine racks and found the latest issue of Shambala Sun ... I started to read the magazine first, not quite in the mood for a book tonight, and quickly realized that these three choices were 'important' after skimming the table of contents and reading the first three paragraphs of the article by Pema Chodron. I am thankful for these synchonicities - in a way that is quite beyond words.

Someone asked me yesterday about what I am thankful for - and all I could say to them, without giving a huge long list, was everything... and I am.

xo
la

I Believe...
That just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other.
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do love each other.

I Believe...
That we don't have to change friends if
we understand that friends change.

I Believe..
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I Believe...
That true friendship continues to grow, even over
the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I Believe..
That you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.

I Believe...
That it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.

I Believe...
That you should always leave loved ones with
loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I Believe...
That you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I Believe...
That we are responsible for what
we do, no matter how we feel.

I Believe...
That either you control your attitude or it controls you. 

I Believe...
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I Believe...
That my best friend and I, can do anything, or nothing and have the best time.

I Believe...
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you
when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I Believe...
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I Believe..
That it isn't always enough, to be forgiven by others.
sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I Believe...
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I Believe...
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but, we are responsible for who we become. 

I Believe...
Two people can look at the exact same
thing and see something totally different.

I Believe...
That your life can be changed in a matter of
hours by people who don't even know you.

I Believe...
That even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I Believe...
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I Believe...
That you should send this to all of the people that you believe in, I just did.

'The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything.'

 Author Unknown

 

~

I can't remember when or where I found this piece first... but I just found it again tonight, and thought I would share. The timing of this rediscovery is quite good for me, just what I needed to hear tonight. I am glad I keep the things that I do sometimes - though I should really label them better ;-)